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Monday, October 15, 2018

A Message To Those Who Have Lost Their Fiancé

 
It has now been two whole years since I had last heard his voice and even longer still since I’ve had the pleasure of being graced by his warm smile. Has it really been two whole years? Yes, it has and it still hurts like a son of a bitch. It’s time to shed a little light on a subject that not so many people have ever had the horror of dealing with; the death of your beloved Fiancé/Fiancée. No, I’m not talking about a widow and no there is absolutely no difference.
Losing my fiancé has been and will continue to be the most agonizing and trying experience of my life. I remember getting the call (it was a Thursday) that there had been an accident just one day before he was due to be home from his pre-deployment training. Three months before his 20th birthday. And just six months from our Wedding day. The month of March will forever rein infamy in my mind.
The first year after I had lost Josh can be summed up in one simple word. Blurry. The days seemed to mesh together and getting out of bed to face another day seemed like crueler punishment than it was worth. I had blocked so much pain and details of the actual event that I began to doubt my sanity.
Was I dreaming? Was he even real? I wasn’t sure anymore.
All that I knew was my high school sweetheart, my best friend, my Marine was not coming home and I couldn’t understand why.
Being a fiancée I found that I wasn’t as openly recognized as his parents and siblings. No one came to my home to see me. No one left pans of lasagna on my doorstep with a sceawled note to make sure I had eaten. For every one hundred sympathy cards the immediate family received I would hold tightly to ten of my own. I felt like I was being ostracized because we did not yet share a last name. Had I been a “widowed” my support system would have been ten miles high. And that’s the sad truth. I remember being asked by his mother if I thought that it would have been harder if we were actually married. The answer to that is no. Absolutely not, and it truly hurt me to think that this is what people thought.
As if my heart and my entire life weren’t already crushed enough.
An engagement ring on my finger did not automatically and miraculously make my Fiancé more important to me. My love grew for him with each and every passing day and I still find that to be true two years after his death. If I could turn back the hands of time I would gladly and unhesitatingly take his place. I don’t know of a love more pure than that.
We need to put a stop to how society sees us. I was deemed as insignificant being told just a few months after his passing that I am “young,” and that I will “move on.” was most definitely the last thing that I wanted to hear. In all honestly it made me feel about this big.
If I should one day decide that I would like to move forward in my love life that is my business and my business alone. The fact of the matter is that Joshua was an enormous part of my life and so he will remain until I give my final breath. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Fiancées/Fiancés and girlfriends/boyfriends go under the wayside when it comes to grief. We loved them too. It is different than that of a parent’s love or even a siblings but that does not mean it is any less. Just different.
We loved them too. We always will. And we absolutely do not have to prove this to anyone else. I still ask myself “Why him?” “Why my Josh?” and then came the only explanation that seemed to make any sense at all…
When we are in a garden which flowers do we pick?
The most beautiful ones.
Read this: 13 Things To Remember When You Love A Person Who Has Depression
Read this: 10 Things Girls Who Have Lost Their Dads Want You To Know
Read this: This Is Me Letting You Go
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Can stomach problems cause lower back pain?

 
Back pain and bloating can be a miserable and frightening experience when they occur together. However, the most common causes of back pain and bloating are usually due to relatively harmless, underlying conditions.
Although back pain and bloating are fairly common symptoms, it is a good idea to see a doctor if they last more than a few days.
Although the most common causes of back pain and bloating are relatively harmless, some of the less common reasons can be life-threatening.

Common causes of back pain and bloating

Back pain and bloating in woman holding lower back
Back pain and bloating may occur together but may not always be related.
It is worth mentioning that these common causes are by far the most likely reasons that a person will develop back pain and bloating. Causes include:
  • hormonal shifts
  • pregnancy
  • back injuries
  • gas and gastrointestinal problems
  • stress
  • urinary tract infection (UTI)
A doctor will check for these conditions before looking for anything more serious.

Hormonal shifts

Hormones are the body's chemical messengers. As hormone levels swing, they can affect the way the body behaves. Both sexes are vulnerable to hormone shifts.
Many women experience back pain or cramping with bloating during or immediately before their period. If the symptoms follow a predictable pattern and do not cause severe problems, they are generally nothing to worry about.
People undergoing hormone replacement therapy (HRT) may also experience bloating and pain. They should discuss these symptoms with a doctor.

Pregnancy

Sometimes, pregnancy causes bloating, constipation, and gas. This is particularly true late in pregnancy when the uterus begins compressing the organs.
The additional weight at the front of the body can also put a strain on the back and hips. Anyone who is pregnant should tell their doctor or midwife about any symptoms they experience, since any conditions or problems that the pregnant woman experiences can affect the baby.
Most causes of bloating and back pain in pregnancy are harmless and typically clear up after delivery.

Back injuries

A wide range of back injuries, ranging from minor muscle sprains and strains to more serious injuries such as herniated discs, can cause back pain.
Sometimes the pain from a herniated disc radiates to other areas of the body, including the abdomen, and can create unusual sensations, such as bloating.

Gas and gastrointestinal (GI) problems

Most of the time, gas is no more than a minor annoyance.
However, gas occasionally produces intense pain that makes the entire abdomen feel full and tender. This pain can radiate to the back, causing back pain and bloating. Minor gastrointestinal problems, such as stomach viruses, may also cause intense gas pain.
Sometimes, GI issues can cause muscle pain. This can happen after straining to have a bowel movement or repeatedly vomiting.

Stress

Stress changes the body, not just the mind. Intense stress or anxiety can trigger both back pain and stomach discomfort, including bloating.
Back pain often occurs because some people who are experiencing stress tense their muscles unconsciously. Stomach pain and bloating are more common in people who have stress as well as an underlying condition, such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS).

UTI

A UTI can cause back pain when it spreads to the kidneys. UTIs also trigger a frequent need to use the bathroom. Some people find that they feel like they need to use the bathroom again immediately after using it.
This sensation may feel like abdominal bloating, pain, or pressure. Severe kidney infections can also cause vomiting that leads to bloating.

Less common causes of back pain and bloating

The following issues may also cause back pain and bloating, but are much less common:
  • spinal injuries and disorders
  • pancreatic cancer
  • liver disorders
  • abdominal aortic aneurysms
  • serious gastrointestinal disorders, such as peritonitis and bowel obstruction
Although rare, these causes and conditions require prompt treatment. Anyone experiencing severe pain or who thinks they are at risk for a rare cause should see a doctor immediately.

When to see a doctor

If pain is severe, or lasts for several days, consult a doctor.
A person should consult a doctor if their pain is severe or lasts several days.
Abdominal bloating and back pain are often just minor annoyances that go away on their own. In many cases, the two symptoms are unrelated.
For example, people with chronic pain in their lower back may periodically experience gas that makes their abdomen hurt and their back pain worse.
See a doctor if the pain does not go away on its own after a few days.
Someone should go to the emergency room if:
  • the pain is unbearable and comes on suddenly
  • the pain is accompanied by bleeding from the rectum
  • they have a severe medical condition, such as liver failure
  • they have recently suffered a serious injury, such as a spinal cord injury
See a doctor within a day if:
  • there is a fever along with the pain
  • the pain is getting worse
  • the pain is different from previous episodes of back or stomach pain

Treatment options

Treatment depends on the cause but may involve the following:

Treating infections and other causes

Bacterial infections, such as UTIs and kidney infections, require antibiotics. Appendicitis and some other causes of swelling in the abdominal cavity may need surgery. If an ectopic pregnancy is the cause of the symptoms, the pregnancy must be removed.

Treating an underlying condition

It is essential to treat any underlying conditions. People with liver failure may need a liver transplant, while those with diabetes may require insulinor diabetes medications.

What if the cause is unknown?

Before a doctor can treat the pain, they must determine the cause. To do this, the doctor may take a complete medical history, press on the abdomen or back to identify pain levels and position, perform blood work, or do imaging scans of the back or stomach.

Home remedies

Drinking plenty of water may help to treat bloating
Drinking plenty of water may help to treat bloating.
There are some home remedies that a person can try to ease back pain and bloating. However, if symptoms are due to a serious condition, such as liver failure, it is essential to talk to a doctor before trying any home remedies. Some treatments may be unsafe for people in organ failure or with other conditions.
If the problem is a minor one, such as gas or a stomach virus, it is usually safe to manage symptoms at home.
Strategies that might help include:
  • taking anti-gas medication
  • applying a heating pad to the back or stomach
  • drinking plenty of water
  • resting
  • deep breathing
  • over-the-counter pain relievers

Outlook

Most cases of bloating and back pain disappear on their own. Some, such as those due to kidney infections or appendicitis, require treatment but can easily be cured with medical care. Managing symptoms will require an ongoing approach in some cases.
Cancer, liver failure, and other serious disorders are more difficult to treat. Early intervention and prompt medical care improve the outlook in all cases.

Takeaway

Abdominal bloating and back pain are widespread complaints, with many possible causes. Unless the pain is intense or accompanied by other worrisome symptoms, it is usually safe to see if symptoms disappear on their own.
However, do not self-diagnose. Only a medical provider can determine the cause of the pain. With prompt treatment, even serious and life-threatening conditions can improve.
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New type of nerve stimulation relieves chronic back pain

 

A new type of nerve stimulation therapy could provide long-term relief for chronic back pain that has not responded to other treatments, including spinal cord stimulation. It could also help certain people who need a non-drug form of pain therapy.

illustration of spine on man with back pain
Up to a quarter of people in America experience low-back pain every year.
So, concludes a study from Rush University Medical Center in Chicago, IL, that featured recently at the 2018 annual meeting of the American Society of Anesthesiologists in San Francisco, CA.
The new therapy is called dorsal root ganglion (DRG) stimulation, and it works by targeting only the nerve fibers carrying signals from the source of pain. Unlike spinal cord stimulation, it avoids nerve fibers that convey messages from non-painful regions.
The recent study evaluated the impact on pain and disability of permanent DRG stimulator implants in people with chronic pain in their lower extremities and back.
Those who received the DRG stimulation says lead author Robert J. McCarthy, who is a professor of anesthesiology at Rush Medical College, "had tried numerous therapies, from drugs to spinal cord stimulation to surgery, but got little to no lasting pain relief."
They reported "significant improvement in pain even after a year, which is notable," he suggests, adding that, "For most, DRG stimulation really improved their quality of life."
A summary of the research is available in the ASA abstracts archive.

Chronic back pain

Although it often accompanies many persistent medical conditions, scientists increasingly believe that chronic pain is a "health concern on its own."
Chronic pain is pain that continues for at least 3 months. It arises when the pain signals that travel to the brain along nerve fibers persist, even though the source of the pain has disappeared.
Estimates for 2016 from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) suggest that around 1 in 5 adults in the United States. live with chronic pain, with around 8 percent having "high-impact chronic pain."
The total annual cost to the U.S. of chronic pain — including the cost of medical treatments, disability programs, and productivity loss — is estimated to be around $560 billion.
Every year, up to 25 percent of people in the U.S. experience some form of low-back pain. For some, the pain persists and becomes chronic, with a total cost of around $100 billion per year.

Spinal cord and DRG stimulation

Spinal cord stimulation treatment involves implanting a small device that sends low-voltage electrical impulses along a wire placed along the spinal cord. The effect is to block pain signals from reaching the brain.
Dorsal root ganglia are clusters of nerve cells — located on each side of the spinal vertebra — that relay pain and sensory signals coming from various parts of the body to the spinal cord and brain.

DRG stimulation disrupts the signals by delivering small electrical pulses through a wire placed alongside the specific DRG associated with the source of the pain. This replaces extreme pain with a more bearable sensation, such as numbness or tingling.
Scientists implant the device, which looks like a small pacemaker, in the lower back under the skin. A pain specialist sets the amount of current that it delivers according to the amount of pain a person experiences.
The idea of DRG stimulation is attractive because, unlike spinal cord stimulation, it only targets the affected nerves. Another reason is that it requires lower levels of electrical current since less spinal fluid covers the targeted DRG than covers the spinal cord.
Prof. McCarthy and his team investigated the effectiveness of DRG stimulation in 67 people with chronic back pain by following them for 3-18 months after implantation. Of these, 17 had the implant for at least 12 months.

'Clinically significant' improvement

People self-assessed their levels of pain on a scale of 1–10 — with 10 representing "the worst pain imaginable" — both before implantation and during follow-up meetings.
Before receiving their DRG implant, most of those in the study rated their pain at level 8. Afterward, the most common pain score was 5, which represents a drop of 33 percent. The researchers describe the improvement as "clinically significant."
There was also a similar decrease in self-reported disability, with a median drop of 27 percent. Researchers defined disability as "limitations in daily living" caused by pain.
When asked if the treatment was helpful, 94 percent of those receiving it said yes.
One person had to have the DRG stimulator removed because of a complication, two people had to have their devices removed following infection, and five others had to have the wires re-inserted.
Prof. McCarthy notes that the DRG stimulator device is not an easy option because of the difficulty involved in placing the electrodes accurately. It could be an alternative, however, for those people who have not experienced any benefit from other treatments.
It could also "reduce or eliminate the need for opioids," he concludes.
"There is a real need for non-drug therapy relief for people with chronic pain.
Read More»

Today at the news stands

 
Daily Graphic:

*Cargo tracking starts today

*My integrity intimidates, threatens some people – Rawlings

*Eden Heights launches luxury apartments

*Teacher dies in Mangoase SHS accident

DailyGuide

*Gov’t saves $7.6bn in power deals

*I didn’t kill judges – Rawlings roars

*Auditor General sued

The Publisher

*I would have killed judges in 1979 – Rawlings

*Alibaba, Whale Cloud partners gov’t on innovative city development

*Pastor drowns chasing offering bowl

*’Wee’ found in Methodist Church

*I will campaign in schools

The Daily Statesman

*Ghana to strengthen bonds with La Francophone – Akufo-Addo

*Power deal review to save Ghana $586m

*Alibaba to partner Ghana in innovative city project

*NDC’s bloated capacity arrangements siphoned millions

B&FT 

* Banking sector not in crisis; 7 failed banks had less than 10% of industry's assets, remaining local banks stable - Dr Addison

* We are open to offers for new airline - Aviation Minister

* EXIM Bank backs 1D1F with GhC417m

Economy Times

* SOEs make GH¢1.2bn losses

* Ghana weighs Green Bonds to fund US$200m in Solar projects

* NIC to announce new minimum capital for insurers soon

Chronicle

* Desperate NDC supports Akamba for inciting students to hoot at @NAkufoAddo - Kpemka

* Experts differ on Election of MMDCEs

Goldstreet Business

* Suspected money laundering cases on the rise as FIC receives 2,010 STRs in 6 years

* Local architects equally competent

* Akufo-Addo to launch maiden Oil and Gas Licensing Round today

New Crusading Guide

* CTN to boost revenue by $50m months project takes of today

* Suhum MCE blows GH¢ 160,000 on 3-unit classroom blocks

Today

* Bagbin supporters jubilate over attack non @JDMahama

* Teacher dead, 40 injured in gory accident

* Mahean youth to hit street over Ablekuma curve-Mahean road

* James Town Mantse to be buried October 20

Read More»

Libya, a mostly desert and oil-rich country with an ancient history, has more recently been known for the 42-year rule of the mercurial Col Muammar Gaddafi - and the chaos that followed his departure.

 
Libya, a mostly desert and oil-rich country with an ancient history, has more recently been known for the 42-year rule of the mercurial Col Muammar Gaddafi - and the chaos that followed his departure.
Libya was under foreign rule for centuries until it gained independence in 1951. Soon after oil was discovered and earned the country immense wealth.
Col Gaddafi seized power in 1969 and ruled for four decades until he was toppled in 2011 following an armed rebellion assisted by Western military intervention.
In recent years the country has been a key springboard for migrants heading for Europe. Concerns have also been raised over the rise of Islamist militancy there.
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Dadumi Duminta:Ashiryanake dana bawa Nigeria rance

 
Mainai man takara kujerar shugaban kasa wato Atiku Abubakar yace"Ashirya take dayabawa yen Nigeria rance

*Inda nazama shugaban kasa ashirye nake dabiyan ma,aikata akan lokaci,da kuma kara daukan ma,aikata
*yakara da cewa"Ashirya nake damabawa duk wani Dan Nigeria Wanda baya aikin gwamnati Albashin #20,000
*yakara da cewa"Ina da kudi shedane saidai nabawa yen Nigeria rance badai subani ba, za muyine kawai don farfado da arzikin kasar mu
*
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IT COULD'VE BEEN WORSE

 
IT COULDVE BEEN WORSE.
James is walking on a downtown street one day, and he happens to see his old high school friend, Harry, a little ways up ahead. "Harry, Harry, how are you?" he greets his old buddy after getting his attention.
"Not so good," says Harry.
"Why, what happened?" James queries.
"Well," Harry says, "I just went bankrupt and Ive still got to feed my family. I dont know what Im going to do."
"Could have been worse," James replies calmly. "Could have been worse."
 
A month or so later, James again encounters Harry, in a restaurant. "And how are things now?" he asks.
"Terrible!" says Harry. "Our house burned down last night."
"Could have been worse," says James, again with total aplomb, and goes about his business.
A month later, James runs into Harry a third time. "Well, how goes it?" he inquires.
"Oh!" says Harry. "Things just get worse and worse. Its one tragedy after another! Now my wife has left me!"
Harry nods his head and gives his usual optimistic-seeming little smile, accompanied by his usual words: "Couldve been worse."
 
This time, Harry grabs James by the shoulders. "Wait a minute!" he says. "Im not gonna let you off so easy this time. Three times in the past few months weve run into one another, and every time Ive told you the latest disaster in my life. Every time you say the same thing: Could have been worse. This time, for Gods sake, Harry, I want you to tell me: how in Heavens name could it have been any worse?"
 
James looks at Harry with the same little wisp of a smile. "Could have been worse," he says. "Could have happened to me."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~``
THE WORLDS LEADING EXPERT ON EUROPEAN WASPS WALKS INTO A RECORD SHOP
He asks the assistant “Do you have ‘European Vespidae Acoustics Volume 2? I believe it was released this week.”
 
“Certainly,” replies the assistant. “Would you like to listen before you buy it?”
 "That would be wonderful," says the expert, and puts on a pair of headphones.
 
He listens for a few moments and says to the assistant, “Im terribly sorry, but I am the worlds leading expert on European wasps and this is not accurate at all. I dont recognize any of those sounds. Are you sure this is the correct recording?”
 
The assistant checks the turntable, and replies that it is indeed European Vespidae Acoustics Volume 2. The assistant apologizes and lifts the needle onto the next track.
 
Again the expert listens for a few moments and then says to the assistant, "No, this just cant be right! Ive been an expert in this field for 43 years and I still dont recognize any of these sounds."
 The assistant apologizes again and lifts the needle to the next track.
 
The expert throws off the headphones as soon as it starts playing and is fuming with rage. 
"This is outrageous false advertising! I am the worlds leading expert on European wasps and no European wasp has ever made a sound like the ones on this record!"
The manager of the shop overhears the commotion and walks over.
"What seems to be the problem, sir?"
"This is an outrage! I am the worlds leading expert on European wasps. Nobody knows more about them than I do. There is no way in hell that the sounds on that record were made by European wasps!"
 
The manager glances down and notices the problem instantly.
"Im terribly sorry, sir. It appears weve been playing you the bee side."
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